I Can't Tell You.

August 16 2009.
That was the last time I wrote in here.
My life has been on that proverbial rollercoaster ride we often use to describe that utter chaos we go through.
Chaos.
It's the hidden turmoil that I've, at times, managed to hide underneath.

To recall every single moment of my life since then would be too much of a painful recollection to handle.
No, wait, not painful.
Intense.

So many things have happened.
Both good and bad. And everything else in between.

22nd October 2009.
That was a day to remember.

I would love to say that I am more empowered and older from it all.
But it's also made me weak, and more vulnerable.

Still, for everything that's happened,
thank you.

It gets darker everytime.

Sometimes it gets a little darker,
When you walk home by yourself,
with nothing but the cold in your hands,
And the gravel trailing your feet.

Sometimes it gets just a bit darker,
Though your home is beyond black
and you feel that empty stolen piece
Of you filling quickly with despair.

Sometimes it gets a little too colder,
As you rub your hands in frustration and
wrap your arms around body in vain attempt,
When the chill of falling begins to set.

Sometimes it gets a bit harder,
To keep returning to a vessel empty of
its life, its love, its truth, and courage,
In facing ghosts that blind and taunt.

Sometimes it feels easier to just lie. Down,
To yourself, to your light, to your vain deity,
Give in, unto, fear hatred anger and complete deceit,
Mirror image growing colder, fainter, darker.

Sometimes the shadows of a room grow with pain,
Deep, dark, desolate decadence.
That bind, hurt, remember and refuse,
Everytime it gets even a little bit darker.

Tell the boy

that I love him.
















and that nothing else matters.

Munchausen (Proxy)

Got nothing to prove, I'm not your whore
You're gonna lose, cause I got more
Not sure you can endure
I'm not your little, I'm not your little, I'm not your little
Whore...

Whore whore whore...
Not your late night booty call
Whore no more...
Don't call me past eleven pm, it won't happen again

Like a scab that won't heal, just another sore
Lost face in the crowd such a lonely bore

Don't call me past eleven pm, it won't happen again
Happened once, it happened twice it happened three times, maybe four times, maybe five times, maybe, maybe it happened six times,
but it won't happen seven times
No no no no no no...

Whore whore whore
Not your late night booty call
Whore no more
Don't call me past eleven pm, it won't happen again


You could call me at 10.59 but don't call me at 11 cause that's my rule now.

How I turned T-Rex into T-Rachel

Ice Age 3 (3D) was surprisingly not a flop.
I found Ice Age 1 hilarious, Ice Age 2, equally funny.
But I had suspected the third part to have run out of its charm.

However, the way I clung to my seat laughing my ass off while trying to keep the 3D visors on my face is.. something much needed.

And 3 movies done, I'm still head over heels in love with Diego.
Rawr.

If you need a good laugh, watch it.

Void

Every night, I find myself writing letters to no one.
Nothing.
Just a void of tangled emotions, confusion.

Where the only reply you receive is the deep set silence of being forsaken.

To be truly alone.
Completely alone.

I wish I was strong enough for that,
because, believe it or not,
I really, truly want that.

Sorry Sorry

They are so annoyingly addictive.
13 guys in a boyband.
And their song gets stuck in my head.
No, I have no idea what the hell they're singing about, but I absolutely love them.
Oh and I think the one at 0:58, 1:49 and at 4:02 is absolutely cute.

And yes, I've been singing along to the song.
And breaking out in stunted dance moves.
-giggles like a schoolgirl-





Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry
naega naega naega maonjeo
nege nege nege ppajeo
ppajeo ppajeo beoryeo baby

Shawty Shawty Shawty Shawty
nuni busyeo busyeo busyeo
sumi makyeo makyeo makyeo
naega micheo micheo baby

baraboneun nunbit soge
nunbit soge naneun machi
naneun machi mwoe hollin nom
(ijen beoseonajido motae)
georeooneun neoui moseup
neoui moseup neoneun machi
simjangeul bapgo wannabwa
(ijen beoseonajido motae)

eodil gana dangdanghage
unneun neoneun maeryeokjjeok
chakan yeoja ilsaegiran
saenggaktteureun bopyeonjeok
dodohage geochim eopkke
jeongmal neoneun hwansangjeok
dorikil su eopsseulmankeum
nege ppajeo beoryeosseo

Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry
naega naega naega maonjeo
nege nege nege ppajeo
ppajeo ppajeo beoryeo

Shawty Shawty Shawty Shawty
nuni busyeo busyeo busyeo
sumi makyeo makyeo makyeo
naega micheo micheo baby

ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta tta-ran-ttan
ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta
nege banhaebeoryeosseo baby
ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta tta-ran-ttan
ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta tta-ra-ppa-ppa-ra

Hey girl gir gir gir gir gir girl i
nunmantteumyeon ni senggae
janakkaena sasil neo hana bakke anboyeo
malhaebwa ni mme naega
malhaebwa jari jabanneunji
malhaejwo naege malhaejwo
naneun babo babo babo

jubyeon saramdeureun malhae
naega neomu jeokkkeukjjeok
i sesange geureon saram
eodi handurinyago
geugeol molla geunyeol molla
sigihamyeo haneun mal
naega bureopttamyeon geugeon
geudaedeuri jineun geo

Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry
naega naega naega maonjeo
nege nege nege ppajeo
ppajeo ppajeo beoryeo baby

Shawty Shawty Shawty Shawty
nuni busyeo busyeo busyeo
sumi makyeo makyeo makyeo
naega micheo micheo baby

ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta tta-ran-ttan
ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta
nege banhaebeoryeosseo baby
ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta tta-ra-ra-ra
ttan-ttan ttan-tta-da tta tta-ra-ppa-ppa-ra

Let's dance (dance dance dance)
Let's dance (dance dance dance)
Let's dance (dance dance dance dance dance)

Hey ije geuman naege wajullae
jeongmal michil geonman gata yeah
nan neoman saranghago sipeo
jeoldae dasi hannun pal saenggak eopsseo [hey]

aeiniragiboda chingugateun
naega doego sipeo
neoui modeun gomin seulpeum
hamkke ganjikagopa
dasi eopsseul mankeum mankeum
neoreul neomu saranghae
naega baran saram niga baro geu
that that that girl

Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry
naega naega naega maonjeo
nege nege nege ppajeo
ppajeo ppajeo beoryeo baby

Shawty Shawty Shawty Shawty
nuni busyeo busyeo busyeo
sumi makyeo makyeo makyeo
naega micheo micheo baby

Gonna miss that crazy happy genius.

5th July, Yiru's Day.
We're gonna miss you. But we'll see you in a few years' time.
Promise.



Seafood Platters @ Fish n Co. Yes, we were fhungry.
Yes, you read that right, fhungry.



The girl's day. And her happy striped scarf.
Already missing our little tyrant.



I believe I was reaching for food.



Colour co-ordinating.



Apparently there wasn't enough food. She bit mine after though, so it was fair.



Yes, um, more food. And us.



Jas, Mags, Lex, Leng, LZ.



We find amusement in the simplest things sometimes.



And yes, Flyer time.







I was happy. I was ecstatic. I was jumping up and down clapping my hands and squealing like a freaking cheerleader. Shuttup.



Kissing the Esplanade (I took this I took this)



View from the top. Well, top-ish.



Like I said, I was happy.




Scaled down model of the IR I think.




Surprisingly, the ride was.. exciting. Because, well, we're an easily excited bunch of kids.
-coughs-
"Ma, ma, I'm at the peak of Singapore"
"Ok. That's nice. Coming home for dinner?"


-rolls eyes-